The Cult of the Cool Mac: Made with 100% USDA real meat!

I don't like McDonalds' food very much. It's mostly because their burgers are so salty rather than because of the calories. But when I'm coming home from someplace at 2am, they're the only restaurant that's open locally -- I've got a 24-hour McDonald's about 2 blocks away from my apartment.

And it's weird to think of McDonald's as a place to go when you're trying to stick to a healthy diet, but they've started offering those Apple Dippers and half-decent salads. The new stuff isn't so bad. Two Apple Dippers adds up to 70 calories. Add another 70 calories for the caramel sauce if you'd like. I started to think maybe McDonald's doesn't suck so much anymore.

But now they've screwed me with a new late-night menu which ONLY has their most expensive and fat-laden burgers on it. You can't even get a single hamburger (260 calories) or cheeseburger (310 calories) anymore. Only the Quarter Pounder (420 calories) and Big N' Tasty (470 calories) and the cheesed versions (510, 520 calories) and of course, the double (730 calories).

And while McDonald's will make special-orders occasionally during the day (albeit with an hour or two wait for them to get around to scraping the mustard off of your burger), they refuse to deviate from the night menu at all. Even if they have a salad in the fridge, they won't serve a salad. Nor a yogurt, nor an Apple Dipper. Just the big burgers. And fries (sm 250, med 380, lg 570 calories).

So McDonald's sucks again. I knew it couldn't last. Didn't you?